[personal profile] radioactiveart
Recently, I lost a face I often use for public address purposes.

I believe I left it somewhere one evening when I was full of both drink and shame over being full of drink and the things I say and do when I am full of drink.

Came home empty-headed, blank, stumbling a bit as I crossed over my threshold.

If I'd had my public face on I might have been able to maintain my composure, but as I was without it, I slapped on the private face I use when I'm home alone and cried like a hypochondriac over a false notion of a need to end this misery -- and then I fell asleep.

Woke up feeling childish, a mere bug of a man. Big eyed, crawling, no longer certain that I have a spine or could fake such a thing. Pure exoskeleton. Easier than ever to squash.

I wonder who has that public face now, the one I wore for years, the one caked with self-confidence and bravado?

If I run into them on the street, will I recognize what I've lost if I see it on another? Will I be able to speak up for myself and what I've lost, or would my voice through the sloppy face I wear now in its place sound cricketish, fly-like, mosquitoesque?

I can't think about that over the buzzing.
From:
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
User
Account name:
Password:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
Subject:
HTML doesn't work in the subject.

Message:

 
Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.

July 2017

S M T W T F S
      1
2345678
91011121314 15
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031     

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 25th, 2017 04:38 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios